their songs make me feel all the things I wanna feel. Ya dig?
and what kinds of feelings would these be?
Happy, horny, occasionally hungry
the chair was smiling at me in sociology and i had to try not to burst out laughing.
I gave them both handjobs at the same time. Felt like I was skiing
She just left after she spent the past 2.5 hours fuckin the shit out of me. I'll put that in the logbook as a cross country
I want to start this convo out by apologizing for the broken toaster.
It's Friday afternoon and I'm drunk. This is how I cope.
You told me if you could get your shoes on, you deserved a coke and rum. We never made it to the party.
That bar is one yeast infection away from total annihilation.
i just called my dad a bottom. he agreed
She walks around topless and loves making sandwiches. That's how a one-night stand turned intoa relationship
Someone messaged me on POF and wished me a Happy International Women's Day. Why do I even bother anymore?
Um that's okay I got up on the table at IHOP and terrorized the entire restaurant for a phone charger after I stole the whip cream from the kitchen and started eating it out the can
No we didn't talk. I was high and doing naked yoga in the living room when she walked in so it was just awkward. I didn't even know my dad had a girlfriend.
My ex unfollowed me on SPOTIFY bruh. Freaking spotify. The butthurt is real
Video on mandys page of you drinking upside down was finally put up...too bad all the comments were about me and him fighting in the background while he screamed "BLOW BIG BETSY!'
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