Lonely and bored. Am I allowed to play Dance Dance Revolution by myself?
So he passed out in the bathroom of the bar, woke up thinking he was somewhere else and called her flipping his shit because he thought she left him. She had to go into the men's bathroom to find him, and then he told her she was "trying too hard to be his girlfriend" over and over again.
Dont they live together now? Havent they been together for like two years?
Yeah. That's the best part. I always thought he was kind of a pussy but turns out he's a degenerate just like us. Welcome
so the time management class we had to take for work seems to be working. I just beat off instead of waiting for gf to get home bc it fit my schedule better.
we may have ended up at a gay bar on accident. we're gonna work this to get free drinks.
yeah, I said "hi, I'm the creepy old guy at the college bar" and she said that she like mature men, wasn't expecting that line to work
On an unrelated side note: I shall now attempt to crawl to the bathroom. Where I will lay motionless on the cold ceramic bathtub with hot water pouring over my shivering body as I desperately try not to vomit. Good day.
all i could think about while he was eating me out was how pretty his eyelashes were
Whoever owns the butter that i always steal out of the office fridge definitely put THC butter in there this time. Shit just got real.
Excuse me, but I got friendzoned and all I could think about was the fact that I didn't have my underwear back on yet.
when you're a senior and the freshman guy you wake up next to asks who you are, you DO NOT give him your real name.
On one hand it was kinda weird his girlfriends stuff was at his apartment. On the other hand it was kinda nice because she had great shampoo
Banana suit guy has an entourage and they're all douchebags. There is no god.
He yelled at me to keep it in my pants and I replied with I will fuck your roommate as much as I please. Oops
We watched playoff games and fucked so we could both see the TV. I've now found true love.
Stranded. In bathroom stall. No toilet paper. I repeat NO TOILET PAPER! Assistance needed asap. GO! GO! GO!
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