Do you think you have hit the lowest point in your life when you find yourself actually condisering watching the movie "Gigli"?
This kristen chick is fuckin nuts. She's pyscho. She's a trainwreck. She carries baggage. She's... Perfect.
Are you with Adam and his vodka?
Yeswdsssss I masde his pickle gi away ans he go anbnoued
when I woke up the last searched thing on my phone was "how to make a fireproof dress" I need to stop drinking.
This isnt meant to be as creepy as it sounds, but do you seriously want a lock of the hair I cut off?
As a fat white girl from Texas I can honestly say that she gave fat white girls from Texas a bad name.
I was informed that last night we held hands while puking on the curb outside the bar.
We just have a real special relationship.
LOOK AT MY HAIR, DOES THIS LOOK LIKE THE HAIR OF A PERSON WHO HAS HER LIFE TOGETHER?
You told the cop you where the star of the Track team and tried to run away. So yeah, i'm not surprised.
Sex obviously provides more sustenance than oatmeal.
I just saw the co founder of Waffle House passed away Friday. Are you okay?
That's about the same time my life started falling apart... Coincidence?!?!? I think NOT!!!
I always feel bad for the sober driver... Never been me but I feel bad... empathetic AF
I just had a 30-minute convo with an irrelevant fuckboy from college who decided to tell me FOUR years later he’s sorry for sleeping with 3 girls at once including me.
you walked 30 min all the way back to the dorms at 2am?
i was more bummed that i dropped all my skittles.
So I lost my dignity between the strip club and your penis...
Randomize
