Godddamnit i jsu woke up in oharee. My connecxtion left an hro ago. Thosse flight atttendants can DRinK
yeah but I shoulda known it\'d be bad when he start rubbing my pubic bone instead of the clit! Awkkkkwarddd
10 dollar pizza all the toppings you want. Wait Until You See This Pizza
When he went down on me, I saw his bald spot... It completely ruined the experience
Where are you and why am I suddenly responsible for your taquitos?
Every time I think about it I can feel His toe in my mouth and I gag, I'm scarred for life.
Best part about a crippling state-wide drought? Actually having a valid excuse for not showering
You're about wine.
Yes, I'm like 90% wine at the moment
ETSY JUST SENT ME AN EMAIL WITH THE SUBJECT "SUMER ROMANCE" I'M BEYOND FUCKING DONE
I gotta give him props though, I've never been propositioned for sex via flash mob.
I woke up on my girls floor with a pound of muenster cheese in my shirt pocket
Man, coughing on your period is like the biggest gamble a girl can make.
I love you man but my hope is that you will not wake me up again by pissing on me
The man built me a fort. Of course he got laid.
? I'm just sitting watching something borrowed alone, crying in my boxers , feel like I should probably do something
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