you miss my big massive throbbing cock dont you?
Woah.
that's not how you spell hell yes.
He about cried when I ordered pizza online. He said it was a miracle.
Her boobs looked like leather oven mitts. No more cougar hunting for awhile.
I love college. Only here at ten in the morning can you hear "Man, hot sauce on my pussy was my worst idea in a long time." while walking down the hall.
I don't know how I'm boarding the plane tomorrow. I have my car registration.
margarita monday on the first day back? my gpa is telling me noo! but my heart is telling me goo! I am conflicted..
We just got home a lil bit ago. No sorority girls showed except the ugly swimmer chick and she asked if I've ever faked an orgasm.
Guess who's the proud owner of her very own foxtail butt plug!!
being serenaded is actually kind of awkward 2/10 do not reccommend
also I saw his dick in the morning light and it was glorious. Like staring upon your birthday cake you ordered from heaven and going " can't wait to eat that later"
I took multi-tasking to a new level. I just ate a plate of nachos off my lap while driving to the bar. And I barely got any on me.
The amount of dicks I have seen in the last hour is more than I have seen in my whole life.
While she was pissing on the neighbors shrubs, they threatened to call the cops...she mumbled 'don't threaten me with a good time", so to answer your question, yes she was drunk.
You left your phone here
Wait...
She called a 10 year old handsome and we gave her a look that was equal parts confused and “what the hell is wrong with you”
Randomize
