8:17pm: So, How was fun day?
1:15am: So I just woke up in my bed in my bathing suit... I don't remember getting into bed or dinner or anything after slip n slide that happened around five... I'd say fun day was a success
I kiss like a newly born barfing kangaroo
You sent me a text calling me "cunt" while i was in the middle of dumping my bf.
So we're fucking tonight?
Thanks for stranding me with th douchebag award recipients
no, i'm currently making the trek across campus to get all my stuff from last night. My ID is in one guys bed, and my camera in another guy's bed.
He came inside me, looked me in the eye and said, "Happy Mother's Day"
You bit the bartender when he refused to poor rum in your purse and hand you a straw.
I'm gonna go out on a limb and say it had something to do with pool sex.
The Deck is crawling with Cougars. Sound the irresponsibility alarm and come drink with me on a Tuesday night.
I'm gonna have sex with my clothes on and I'll know everyone there so I'll be in my comfort zone
You were drinking whiskey from a beer bottle i dont know what you really expected...
Maybe if I get to know him I'll stop wanting to fuck his wife so much.
You had me at "let me see your balls"
Whelp, I woke up on the front lawn this morning. I have got to stop wearing these underwear. Every time I do, I end up puking in someone's greenery.
SUFFER THE WRATH OF THE PISS BAG
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