College reaches a new low. We just carved a shot glass out of a potatoe.
And then you told your sister how horrible of a friend I was because I couldn't get you cheese fries...
How am I a tease?
Dude you flashed me ur vagina and walked away.
ONLY PART OF IT.
Just topless shotgunned a bud light alone. I am about to peer mentor the shit out of these freshmen.
are you aware you chucked your pizza at a girl's face after the bar last night?
You are too young to settle down enjoy your life. The window to get drunk and have casual sex with strangers gets smaller by the day.
i also took my stockings off in the bathroom and blew my nose with them in the cab ride home. james was appalled
Welp just pooped in a garbage can. Guess I'm not better than you at life in any aspect.
I now have a GPA requirement for guys I hookup with more than once.
so you know how I brush my teeth after I give you a bj? according to my dentist my teeth have never been cleaner. looks like this will be a recurring thing
your house isnt even gonna be on google maps after this party
I vaguely remember hanging my bra off the ceiling fan and chugging a beer during sex
College has turned you into quite the multi tasker huh?
Btw when I was saying "fuck you" I meant it like "be quiet beautiful princess"
I used my dress as a plate for pizza rolls last night
What a weekend. It started with me realizing i might not be straight and ended with me spraining my foot.
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