Hold on, I'm google imaging "vagina close ups" to see if mine match up
Oh well. haha. i couldn't really understand what she was saying. i just nodded a lot. i guesss she found that sexy.
gotta love spring break
gotta love slutty girls from the south
It's not kidnapping if it's romantic
and you're not allowed to put a penis in you if it's attached to a 26 year old who works at blockbuster
Mmmhmmm sure, nice try, but there's certain wounds that only bj's can heal
A burger king employee called me from your phone while you were on their bathroom floorl. Hope ur not in jail....4 realz
Here's the level of my committment: I'm not participating in the Olympic opening ceremonies drinking game. THIS IS SERIOUS.
Next time I think buying tan-thru bikinis is a good idea, remind me of that time I passed out in one and burned the epic shit out of my pussy.
When was that?
Yesterday. Bring aloe. For my pussy.
And anyway at least being paid in opium makes a cool story
i will not be out-irished. not this night. if i don't wake up tomorrow handcuffed to a hospital bed, i have failed my ancestors.
Sincerely. Thanks. You could have thought of anyone sitting on your face but you chose me. :)
I only want to come over for sex and blueberry pancakes
In other news, my ex fuck buddy is a surprisingly good wingman.
I'm covered in jizz and the toll booth lady knew it
I’m going to hump him until his teeth hurt and then I’m going to have my way with him
Randomize
