Ummmm yeah ..,.. All three girlfriends I have right now are chatting with each other at the party...... I'll see you on the other side
Look what our sorority has done to us...we're hitting on girls in hopes of getting an awesome little.
No. I do not want to discuss your lesbian tendencies with my sister.
She still started it.
But please don't judge me if i smell like mustard
You should know that Team Beyonce's Vagina dominated in pong last night
Is percocet and coffee considered a balanced breakfast?
Mike is so stoned. I just heard him quietly mutter to himself "rock a piss" as he walked down the hall to the bathroom
I have chafed skin from the handy she gave me. I told her that and she said return the favor when it heals. I'm in love.
You blacked out at 9:30 and insisted on sleeping in the hallway after you chugged an entire pitcher of beer. I guess the Jell-O shots were stronger than we thought...
What, I can't laugh at my sister being driven crazy by Facebook randomly assigning chat significance to the guy she lost her virginity to?
I'm so high right now that I'm wearing gloves.
another side note: i'm officially selling my underwear on the internet
They think I'm one of them. I'm about to get drunk in a Santa suit and bust down the door singing Christmas carols.
I have four things I would like to do over summer too... Problem is they're all roommates
We've been taking shots, cranking Marilyn Manson, and eating your bacon. Your kid is probably ruined.
Randomize
