when im bored during the day i often think, what do people who dont get high do with their day.. i came to the conlcusion that everyone must be getting high
She offered to make me a fruit roll up salad for breakfast...I'm not sure if that's the coolest or weirdest thing ever...
Well for one thing, she was eating rice with a shot glass.
i woke up naked with 27 half ripped $ bills in my bed from ripping them off the wall of the bar
so she finally agreed to being friends with benefits. not only did I take her virginity, when I woke up, she brought me French toast made with homemade bread in bed.
I worship thee.
Just found out my mom's voicemail password is 6969..
It was at that moment that I realized I was alone. Alone and drunk on an Epcot ride.
Are you seriously trying to guilt me into sending you naked pictures by saying "So I can look at them during dialysis" ?
Is it working?
he thinks the dog can do a keg stand. i will let you know how it turns out
explaining to a nurse how i all most cut my finger off playing beer pong, she def just hand me a AA booklet.
I called him and he said hell call me back hes in the middle of his kareokee song he was out by himself and his dog
In honor of today being Sunday I am day drinking and watching Grey's Anatomy all day. ALL DAY.
People were staring and acting all judgmental and offended... Like they've never seen anyone breastfeed in a liquor store.
All im saying is that my face might fall off.
Remember when I made out with that stranger at the bar on my 21 in chicago? I wonder how he's doing
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