the red head has a bf
just because there's a goalie doesn't mean u can't score
you really need to stop walk of shaming home from theme parties.
I made $300 today by selling pizza @ $4 a slice to nerds who refuse to leave the library. God I love finals time
She won't let me open the car door while we are on the highway so I can throw up outside. She deserves to have her car thrown up in.
Well at least it wasn't the first time I threw up out of a second story window
Hate to say it and even though I definitely have a biased opinion but I'm surprised your not, sleeping with anyone else. Good personality, charisma and amazing in the sack.
Feel free to use me as a reference.
I'm a gymnast. they should know better than to let me get dunk near anything i can flip on
I should be a dude... Walking a goat on a rope is a total chick magnet.
just once I'd like to not pass out before we leave the designated pre-drinking place
Toppless hop-scotch needs to become a competitive sport
I swear, the cow we tried to tip tried to eat me. and all I could think was, oh how the tables have turned. worst trip ever
I'm recreating the you're a wizard harry video with a guy on snapchat whilst having snapchat sex with another... Adulting is fun
I would fuck him just for his dog
So do I get points for screwing my recently single ex boyfriend and then telling him to go fight for his ex back?
I think I recall josh coming in to the room to tuck us in and give us a few condoms and I threw them back all furious and told him 'we don't use those.' Oh god
Randomize
