South Carolina's governor once cited "moral legitimacy" when he was a congressman voting for President Bill Clinton's impeachment. Karma is a bitch.
ugh. people who use coupons make me wanna punch a baby.
You were so drunk that you were trying to take pictures of a MILF at the park so you could send them to Adam, but you didn't want to "seem creepy," so you used taking pictures of her son as a cover. Needless to say, cops were called.
Does it really count as two different guys if they're brothers? I like to think of it as one and a half.
I can hear my liver begging me not to go out tonight
I honestly didn't see the problem playing beer pong In the car on the road trip home.
Theres a picture of me with cut up clothes rolling in the policeman's lawn, I missed you, summer.
Hahah fuck. I keep looking to make sure that stupid line doesn't show up when my guards are down. Babies can sense fear.
Sounds like sex on a twister board.
An idea that is both hilarious and intriguing...
I mean, you have to swipe right on someone you had sex with last week though, right?
friends are allowed to bang on New Years, I read it on the Internet somewhere.
she walked through the crowd, completely naked, slapped a pool attendant in the face and stole the towel he was carrying. she used it to dry her hair.
Nothing screams "crazy cat lady" like a nursery in your house when you're over 30, single and have no kids.
Man, I'm never going tanning again he noticed the burns on my ass
Unfortunately the rum ran out midway through our viewing and we had to suffer in silence for the rest of it.
Randomize
