yea ive hooked up with like half those guys
and i've hooked up with the other half...when our powers combine, we are captain slutbag
I was found on the hood of someone elses car... Who would've thought there were 2 white nissans?
He spanked me with a plate. I'm not sure where this is going...
She definitely looked like a troll, but I had take one for the team. Or at least thats what I keep telling myself
We made out while a LIT cigarette dangled out of the side of his mouth. Disturbing or slightly erotic?
She told me my pubes were as soft as "fine wool"
And they were awkwardly all over each other in a Christian way.
But here's the wonderful thing about us. It's us. You could invite me over, get really wasted and end up sleeping with someone else and id be there in the morning to take you to breakfast.
Got stuck at my fwb place for three days because I decided sex was more important than my safety in the weather. Worth it.
I was standing in my mom's kitchen in only my neon green thong, eating pizza over the garbage can, and sobbing while he was yelling at me.
Anyone who does not consider cereal and wine as a balanced breakfast needs to leave immediately.
Getting high with your mom, but thinking of you!
The only thing I remember about us having sex is yelling at him to choke me.
You laid on the floor and pet their rug. and then demanded Voss water.
I fucked a 6 foot tall guy who has abs showing without even flexing... I am a wizard and I have magical powers.
Randomize
