best part he said "i like your tattoo" as he walked into the room, stood right there looking at me, naked on top of his friend
I really need to stop carrying a flask around with me in my backpack at school..
Aren't you in 8th grade?
9th, but that's not the point.
no seriously. she's even got the premier of the real L word on her calendar at work. that lesbian.
he's from indiana, of course he's clueless about "g-spots"
two gay guys came in and bought just a kite and a box of wine. Why cant I have saturday nights that awesome
First I must say that I am disappointed to learn that you knowingly have trashy friends with whom you've not hooked me up.
there was a trail of blood coming out of one of the bathroom stalls. thought of you
Do you know how I hurt my ankle or my shoulder? Or the origin of any of the following mystery bruises: left quad, left wrist, right elbow. Thanks for playing.
after giving head I just always feel like I need like. ice cream. as both a means of getting the lingering sperm out of my mouth, and a congratulations.
Fun Fact: I do not remember what its like to be sober between drinking off and on for two weeks at my "vacation" and being on painkillers for my mouth now
So random question. Does beer act the same as other alcohol disinfectants?
We're snowed in with only two condoms. This will literally be valentines day russian roullette.
So many weird people in this class. I can practically taste their unwanted virginities. They taste bad.
I swear to god he thought my ass was a bag of wine last night.
We ended the night eating peanutbutter with our hands and smoking cigarettes in the house at 4am. Fucking Everclear, man.
Randomize
