Ok so serious question: if one wanted to say the plural of mongoose, would it be mongooses or mongeese?
I am watching the symphony and have decided that violin players probably give really good hand jobs.
Omg I'm so stupid. All the peoples fb status that said "spain" I thought they were all going to spain.......
There is so much to learn about oneself from autofill.
Easy Mac is falling out of my sweatshirt as I'm walking down the street.
And I was slip and sliding my life away on a giant tarp with tons of soap and bitches. Priorities man, priorities.
we are all four or five tequila-induced decisions away from shitting in a bucket, come get me please.
Come my child we shall walk thru the pasture of amazing sex and corndogs. Hint:some corndogs are not corndogs.
He puked over my shoulder into the toilet. The guy in the next stall sounded totally appalled.
Would it be weird if your parents sold me weed?
I'm hurting so bad I actially had to wait for my mini wheats to get soggy before I could eat them..
Please make sure you have solid number of friends around you that wouldn't be afraid to break a bottle and stab someone. If you're planning on drinking all of that, you're going to need a safety net.
I JUST LIKE FLANNEL, NOT VAGINAS! OK?
He actually said the words 'I miss you' followed by 'I wanna have sex with your face'. I'd say that's a win.
So hypothetically speaking.. say someone dropped their birth control pill in a hot bowl of soup, and it possibly disintegrated.. would it be just as useful?
Randomize
