It was the single greastest thing to happen to my dick ever
She was so bad on top that i found myself watching a TV that wasn't even turned on
She started crying. I don't think she's gotten head from a sax player before.
Standing in front of the open refrigerator with a 3/4 empty bottle of wine eating Bac-o's from the jar, topless. Somebody really should've taught me better coping skills.
I feel like I just tasted lung cancer.
How did it go last night?
Woke up head half shaved and a burrito? So good and bad?
i ended up playing naked naked monopoly and hangman with my dealer. i really love my life.
and then we all passionately sang "what if god was one of us" until everyone passed out in the grass
When I told him he could take naked pics of me, did I really need to specify that he could not email them to my brother's friends for bragging rights?
No joke, I just found $85 on the ground. Must be because I bought you all that liquor. So much good karma.
id one day like to live in a world full of emotionless and wonderfully fullfilling sex...
It's 2:10 am I am sprawled on the floor of the kitchen drunk and eating cold chicken wings come help
My purse is like an anchor I can't move I am sliding around like an over turned turtle send help
This floor is really dirty send a maid if you can
My next goal in this relationship is to teach my boyfriend that there are valid reasons to be fear of dolphins completely.
It was kind of like hidden Mickey ears, but with dicks.
I just landed at Logan and some guy threw up in the baggage carousel. Boston never really changes
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