The elaphant ear plant popped a new leaf ! Wahoo !
I was just curling my hair topless and I just burned my nipple. Ouch.
Could you please tell me why If you were a 21 year old man why you would want to sleep with a girl who has tinkerbell bedding?
I had a dream that the allstate guy hooked up with flo from the pregressive insurance commercials and she gave birth to the geico gecco. I need to stop taking ambian.
it was like the sexual equivalent of when Wilson fell off the raft and floated away
Just saw someone buying TWO six packs of O'Doul's. WHY ??
No, I'm not keeping her! I can't become an adulterer and a dog stealer in the same 24 hours...
They only knew me as the lesbian that passed out in a bathtub. That's not what you call friendship.
Every single person in dollar tree stares at you if you are buying a pregnancy test and wearing a charlie brown costume. Just FYI.
Do what? I was just saying that at some point there's a chance I'll have a boner. Think of it like a guessing game. "Does he have one now?"
Myy bathroom floor makes me think I'm on Mars. Also. Did you realize that yesterday we perfected thee mind high-five??
I woke up knowing I have nowhere to be today except parties and it was glorious and I am so happy
I just saw a girl drinking wine and walking her dog in footie pajamas and a mad hatter hat. First day of the new year and I think I'm in love.
I feel like you should put up a missed connections ad for this..
Also, next time I go get a wax, I'm gonna ask the girl about the innie to outie ratio she sees on the daily.
Damn. Looks like nobody I know is doing anything interesting. Guess it's another slut-it-up-with-strangers sort of night.
Randomize
