Hoooooo maaaaan
Yes?
I'm retarded. Again.
I tried ok? my penis just doesnt like her as much as my mother does
We'll probably be arrested for having a cheetah in our apartment anyway, so I say go for it.
Her parties are sponsored by Valtrex. This might not be your best idea.
I'm thankful she wil die Alone. And I'm thankful I slept wiht her cousin. And brother.
I feel like my vagina stays drunk longer than the rest of me. It's always super sensitive and hungry the day after drinking.
lit a joint with my parents wedding matches today, this is what happens when you're out of lighter fluid. didnt even feel guilty.
It was kinda hard to explain to his wife why there was chocolate syrup on the ceiling.
If I remember correctly I tried to steal a mail truck last night
She's really sweet and cute, but when she drinks, she becomes way too proud of her bush.
Funny you say that, I just sold my stripper pole to my mom tonight...
I lost my wolf penis dildo in my garage. I should probably find it before I resume my garage sale tomorrow...
Come as you are, bitch. Glitter and vodka provided.
He’s 48, has a Prince Albert piercing and a white Range Rover
Going back to our hometown to help Gramma move. Thinking we should see if we can fuck on the desk of the homophobic coach who first introduced us while in town.
Randomize
