lol you are funny thanks bro I'll take you to a strip club
I don't wanna go to a strip club I'd rather get my boobs free or earn them from a series of good deeds
Ha! What's wrong with that? Hard work deserves compensation. I accept cash, checks, and boobies!
No, I'm talking to this Chinese girl. Can't understand a word she's saying, but i think i caught the word vagina a few times.
I feel like I am becoming dumber sitting here in class than I would be sitting on the couch smoking weed.
We discussed how the marijuana was making the dopamine float around our nucleus accumbens last night when we were high. Yet another example of how our science classes are perverting our good times.
SHE has hooked up with both me and my sister. I don't even know what to say. If she goes for my parents next I may have to kill her
The beer-amid has reached five feet. Caitlyn has a taser. GTG
Oh and my new excuse for not being able to hook up is cholera, feel free to use it
Four times in one night? That Energizer bunny outfit lived up to the hype.
I don't understand why she gets annoyed by my drunk texts. It means she's who I'm thinking about even when my brain isn't functioning properly.
Don't forget the part about the bar bathroom stumbles.
Oh damn, you're right. I have to include that. You turned off all the lights with your head. That was impressive.
If I'm walking weird, don't judge me. Things got kinda outta hand with the GoPro on.
Dude fuck drugs. It's 4am and I'm eating mushroom ravioli fantasizing about jumping on a trampoline
If he sends me a dick pic so help me god.
All I have in my purse is 10 cents and a plastic ducky.\nI can't explain last night.
Sitting beside a stoned cat on the kitchen floor eating cheesecake with my hands...just a struggle
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