people will do anything to get on MTV. like get pregnant.
Tell mom and/or dad that I am going to be home late. I am really blazed. Don't tell them that part, though.
i just noticed 4 flies in my red wine. i drank them.
Taljing aboutpenisrs w gerruly ska pops
I don't want to have to wonder if I'm draining my pasta in the same side of the sink you pissed in
2 showers later and I'm still finding cum on random body parts of mine
I basically get to watch her life fall apart via tumblr updates
My lips are sealed. Both pairs.
Get caught with marijuana. Cop takes piece. Buy new bong. Circle of fun.
DO IT, or I'll send you pictures of my hickey to remind you of your loneliness
Today I'm playing this game called how physically long can I Lay in this one spot before moving, do you have an estimated time of departure?
I found out his moms name, maiden name, profession, and office location, his dads name and profession, his home phone, picture of their house, all of his work profiles, and the cost of their house. All I'm trying to do is find his damn twitter
So I got this new job… ever been fucked in a corner office before?
Only in the emergency room do they shut the door when youre laughing too hard
Hey long story short Grandma needs bail money.
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