just a forewarning-if you come home and hang out with your stupid girlfriend the entire time that you are here/fail to get wasted with us i will wish either death upon you or that you truly do turn gay when you return to the navy.
I love wearing low cut shirts cuz then when class gets boring, I can look down and admire my breasts.
I wish I could tell you that the worst thing that happened last night was how he got thrown out of a stripclub for vomitting on the girl giving him a private lapdance. I wish I could tell you that and not be lying.
Is it wierd that you're going to be my best man and you've fucked my wife?
so its official, girls can see a boner through my snuggie.
dude. this chick is staring at me like i gave her brother herpes.
she asked to have her picture taken with every guy we walked by.
I'm currently day drinking, studying and making corn. Don't tell me what I can't do.
Why on earth is he slamming his body into the wall again?
I literally just fucked insane clown pussy. 24 yo nut job moonlights at children's parties. Gave me head while still in full clown makeup from my kid's birthday party.
bullshit you weren't drunk, you pointed at me and said my cigarette was empty
you face planting the wall was epic
did you at least save my tooth
Just blew on a shot of whiskey to cool it off, like it was soup...
I came home and drank a bottle of wine in the bathtub. I have AMAZING coping skills!!
Listen, she cheated on him first. I've known both of them since we were 12. They have no secrets from me. And yes, as a matter of fact, I absolutely did enjoy screaming out his name into his, soon to be, ex wife's pillow.
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