hotel room ftw
watching a tv show about cocaine.. just explained to my mom why the test monkey chose coke over food
i got excepted to unl lol
You mean "accepted".
Someone jacked my earrings off me or I threw em in the toilet again
I hate when that happens
Okay the common myth about putting tampons in you nostrils for a nose bleed is busted. It just starts coming out through your throat.
Everyone loves nachos, first of all. Second, Ke$ha is entirely appropriate for the age grou too young to realize she probably has Hep C.
I mean, who doesn't have an ex involved with bath salts?
All I want to do is shower, but there is a keg in there.
I'm crying and shaving my Bronco playoff beard
I'm so baked, I spent the last hour trying to screencapture the cracks on my phone.
Aint no party like a Broke College Girls Eating Stuffed Crust Pizza party
Great, now even dream!me is a drunken borderline mess.
I just showered and shaved both ankles and one knee because that's the skin that's exposed in the jeans I'm wearing today. Please tell me I'm not the only one who does that.
Maybe if you would fuck your boss you would get string cheese too
I am eating croutons on my bathroom floor. Are you happy?!
Randomize
