Megan Fox is the only woman I would let pee on me.
I'm similar. She's the only woman I'd ask to pee on me.
Ok yeah you're right. I'd ASK Megan Fox to pee on me. I'd ALLOW Erin Andrews to pee on me if she asked.
The brown eye won't let me do that either.
I just saw a girl make a shank with the underwire in her bra...
The sex was so good, I called my ex during the 2nd time just so he could hear. Is that mean?
We walked because you started screaming when you finally realized he wasn't Ben Bailey and it wasn't the Cash Cab.
A guy in a big stork costume just came to our meeting to give us condoms and t-shirts telling us not to get pregnant. Only at college
i just called corporate taco bell to ask about the life span of a chicken burrito.
All four of us managed to throw up in the same bathroom at different times during the night. I think we'll get along great living together.
He's only a little bit crosseyed.
I think this is one situation where "a little bit" doesn't mean much.
She got a text from her mom saying "you better not sleep with him, we all know how he is". IV ONLY BEEN HERE A WEEK
Mr. Clingalot just ran from our apartment. What the hell?
I started to cry afterward and mumble random things. Examples: "God, please don't make me be so gay anymore" and "my mom is going to be so proud of me for fucking a dude this time." It was that or let him stay the night and cuddle. I mean, fuck that horrible shit I'm a girl that needs her space.
To be so small, the mini-horses are exceptionally aggressive. And fast. Very, very fast.
Abort! Abort! He almost bit off a finger!
then she lifted her dress, tweaked her own nipples, and then ordered another round for everyone. this place is wild at 9pm.
Everytime I try to keep track of the amount of people I slept with I always forget about that guy I met on the dc metro, where I woke up to him organizing his Special K and Molly and I was covered in sleeping cats.
We both fell asleep mid-handjob and he continued to call it "handjob halftime".
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