Are you with Adam and his vodka?
Yeswdsssss I masde his pickle gi away ans he go anbnoued
Some random slut told me I was a good dancer then gave me a handjob. I felt like fucking John Travolta.
I briefly wondered why they weren't in school, but after the tinier one shouted "check out dem titties!" I had my answer
They sext over her pic comments. Role playing as wolves.
how the hell did this chicken wing end up in my cast?!
And that's why we do second round interviews for possible roommates.
You pole danced in your parka.
We are 100% horrible people, and im extremely happy we are friends
I'd just like to formally thank you for the size of your dick. The gods must really love you.
Can't find my wig, my underwear, or my dignity. Halloween 2016
But I put cranberries and apples in my wine so it's festive drinking not suicidal drinking
Fuuuuuck dude, he’s got #Excel in his Facebook bio; I’m screaming
So it turns out that a Ford Focus does not fit in a Walmart cart return.
Last night I had a dream that a man with an ice cream body entered a bicycle throwing contest and won.
I think I'm more excited for Santa to come now that I made a drinking game out of it
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