Christians are straight up FREAKS
so she proceeds to puke everywhere, look up at me like a sick dog, and then say, "i'll finish if you want me to."
Spotted at kelly concert- 10 year old in a homemade "I do not hook up" t shirt. Well I should certainly hope not, sweetheart.
The last thing I remember is you asking me how to grow french fries.
He's got a pretty small dick but he's a total sweetheart. I'm gonna buy a new dildo and just deal with it.
There are going to be so many Snookis this Halloween that I might just dress as the guy that hit her and punch them all in the face
I feel like he knows I had a dream about him eating me out in the janitors closet at the holiday party. He's giving me THAT look.
The strip club called, they have your shoe.
I'm in a hotel full of Marines. I'm leaving here pregnant.
Hes pre-made beer lollipops so he "can suck before the sex" QUOTE!
But I do know they give away thousands and thousands in booze
My liver has a boner
how do you expect me to pass the time when I'm too old to be jailbait but too young to legally drink
Well I was kicked out of the bar and woke up on a picnic table. I'd say the night was awesome!
that is either the most profound and meaningful thing i've ever heard, or someone got high before noon again.
Babe if there was a way to give a back rub and head at the same time that's what I would ask for my birthday, Christmas and of course right now. Please think about how and get back to me.
Randomize
