Jon and Kate. Drink everytime we see tears. Drink twice if a child cries. Finish your bev if you cry.
I just found 'pokemon orgy' in my search history
you just broke rule number 1. If you can't lift her up don't date her
Dude they even gave me free lube for being tested! Best. Hiv test. EVER.
His band may suck, but it's not like I'm sleeping with all of them.
Quick question: how do I take a nice picture of my ass? I'm asking you because I figure with an ass like yours you're probably experienced.
On a better note: I'm on pace for 730 female produced orgasms in 2013.
I forgot I did whipits. Probably because my brain cells were killed from the whipits
It was a great idea until we got stuck in a ditch. We had to call redneck cousin 1
He got the life proof phone case so he could jack off in the shower without his wife knowing
The oven caught fire. I put it out, but called the fire department just to make sure it was okay since the smoke wasn't going away
You just wanted to meet firemen
I definitely fucked a Trump supporter last night but I wouldn't let him fully admit it because then I would've had to leave and his cock and abs were too perfect
I vote we just hike, drink, and destroy dick
I was literally so lonely last night that I stopped watching a video on porn hub and just read the comments
we started drinking at 4pm, somehows its 1 am im in bathing suit running from the cops.....any explanation of what happened?
Randomize
