I dont need to watch it. And stop comparing your life to Entourage.
I really liked your hair last night but that style makes it really hard to hold it while you puke
I was 10 minutes late leaving for lunch today because I couldn't lose a boner. It is impossible to tuck it when your shirt is tucked in...gotta quit facebook stalking hot chicks at work
Last night was def like the makeout party episode of full house
Some guy said that sham wows were the same as regular shammys. needless to say you had to be restrained. you kept trying to 'slap chop' him.
i need to know the scientific term for a guy's taint so i can explain what i did last night.
I'm naked and wearing a cowbell.i love med school.
The guy at the ER said it was the first time he's given stitches for a funneling accident. Then he seemed upset that I took pride in that...
So I just stole my deans keys to break into the dining hall to get coco puffs. I shouldn't have gone to this meeting stoned.
Thank you. Next to bondage, soft American Apparel t-shirts are the best things you've taught me about.
you walked in, put on rap music and started chugging vodka
Thank you for deleting me from Instagram. Also, I'm carrying your child. Happy new year!
I lost a fight last night. By that I mean I head butt the bar and busted my lip open.
And change of plans today, I'm gonna lay in bed and eat taco bell and try not to die. Brazilians another day.
dude i told her that I loved her...and she said, " go fuck yourself"
Randomize
