Farted during a conference call.SBD. permeated the room people were gonna puke.noone could say anything or leave cus we were on the phone with clients. coworkers were outraged.how I still have a job is beyond me.
Normal people don't sit around and watch Degrassi for twelve hours...
FUCK YOU.
I saw Winona at my church today. She has boobs, now.
Miracles do happen.
I wish orgasms lasted as long as the pain from rug burn
Ice skating? Did you see me last night? I don't even know where my socks are
Alright we have to be drunk.before noon tomorrow. Its a new law i just got passed through congress. It goes into effect imediately
She hash-tagged my name. I think it's safe to say that she remembers our hookup.
When asked if they had been introduced, Damo said "No but I know we've pretty much fucked all the same girls in town"
I'm going through our high school yearbook trying to find what boys I want to hook up with this summer. We graduated four years ago. That's a problem.
The waitress at the airport bar just asked me if I wanted a "to go" beer, hahahahaha OF COURSE I WANT A TO GO BEER.
if anyone knows where my shirt is please let me know and if you know why I don't have my own shirt please also let me know. also do any of you know why I'm missing a bra wire?
Def went to work still drunk... the only comment i got was good to see you drinking more water...
plus like he's kinda a piece of shit. a beautiful somewhat talented piece of shit that hella needs to get his life together
You can't just drop that I might be walking into a foursome and leave it at that
Should I be worried if two ants just crawled out of my purse?
Yes!
Randomize
