never. drinking. again.
lets not get ahead of ourselves.
I GOT EATEN OUT IN A MERCEDES ON A TUESDAY NIGHT. I EARNED THIS SHIT.
i took a field sobriety test yesterday. a crowd gathered, watched me pass it and applauded. then the cops arrested me because i took a bow and fell over.
I need to stop making out with boys in plain view of half my class.
He looked like Harry Potter. I had to do it.
and i had to drink on "never have i ever unsuccessfully tried to seduce a virgin ginger"
just found a shoebox labled "emergency smoking box"... it has a lightbulb, 2 potatoes, a dried up flower, and a button that says "stop drop and roll". what did we do last night?!
Did they have a limo or was i just stoned?
I'm not wearing underwear, I started my period this morning, and it's super windy. Recipe for disaster?
Apparently after awhile self preservation trumps libido. This is new news to me.
Dude. That Grinch had his priorities right when he was worried that there might be a cash bar at that town celebration.
What! You have to go to class. Otherwise, you're wasting money that could have been spent on weed. Gotta get that shit in perspective.
My roommate just walked in on him eating me out ..happy finals week right?
We had sex on the bear rug. He said "you, me and the bear. This is bear-idise"
Something tells me tonight will end with me wearing my pants on my head again.
Feel free to drag me back to reality at your convenience
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