i hope kanye doesn't show up to patrick swayze's funeral. " i'll let you get back to your funeral in a minute...but michael jackson had the best death of the year. just sayinnn ".
This was all being yelled across a beer pong table as all important things should be discussed
Ok. Cause im very serious about this. I wanna strip and do coke for a month
Your ability to be a slut in your nightmare astounds me
This is the first time since last march I'm gonna be going to a class for more reasons than wanting to bone the girl sitting next to me.
We decided to cut you off after you insisted on eating peanuts by the dumpster
Just dont tell him. Tell him you colored your vagina for breast cancer awareness month. He will understand.
Jesus, you make out with one twin then sleep with the other and suddenly they don't want to play soccer with you... Men can be so sensitive...
I need a costume
Dude just wear a bra or something hahaha
I caught a glimpse of his penis. I can only imagine what your mom's vagina goes through because of that penis
I tried to take a cute nude but sneezed halfway through. I sent it anyway
I have bruises all over my legs. Did I hit a car with my bike last night?
Right?? Give me some apple scented candles and I'm a fall wet dream
I haven’t sent any nudes yet in 2018.
That’s not true...is it?
Apparently I drunkenly told him I was going to ride him to the rodeo and break him like a bronco, then I stole his nachos and beer. Adulting is hard!!!
Randomize
