big game today.. looking forward to seeing that magic win, and then i will celebrate with a nude dip in lake Eola.. anyone else in??
he keeps dipping things in ranch and feeding them to me
Theyre still fighting about whether its called america or the united states.
There's a hobo dancing by himself. Is anyone going to ask how he got in the house?
OMG THIS GUYS LICENSE PLATE IS GETTNHRWET
Is it bad to go up to the security desk and ask them for the name of the guy I signed in last night? I have absolutley no clue
its a vaginal recession for me, ill take what i can get
Just heard my neighbor say "I'm just gonna lay down in a coma until someone comes into my room and hands me a beer." He's got his priorities straight
We need to get her a baby shower present. And no, a blow up sex doll with her dead boyfriends picture stuck to it, is not appropriate.
Turns out I was the only one drinking. I broke one guy's bed and kicked another in the face. Then when an RA came by I shouted to let him in he's gonna find the vodka anyway. Great night
YOU'RE HIGH AND AT THE GYM OF COURSE YOU FEEL WEIRD
My thighs feel like glass
My roommate has gone Christmas crazy. It looks like Jack Frost came all over my living room. Wanna come fuck me in the fake snow by the fireplace?
I almost got an A in organic chem but started hallucinating during the final so I got a C
I plan on getting so intoxicated, that I think it's MY own birthday
Can I play this game?
she was all excited about us being eskimo sisters and then i was just like "alyssa i've literally been inside of you" and she got even more excited
Randomize
