why is there a picture of someone wearing Tevas with socks taped on the wall?
Wow, Pearl Harbor and The Notebook are on. Its like the Im going to kill myself marathon.
just got high and bedazzled my bra. other than bleeding from the prongs life is so good.
We aren't going to mix hockey and sex texts tonight.
I totally agree. all sexting is on hold till after the games over.
Playoffs. This shit is serious.
Not sure if jager bombs can cure tuberculosis, but its a theory im testing as we speak
and i'm pretty sure he drank the lava lamp
She took a crow from her moms Halloween decorations, taped it to her shoulder, went to the bar and made the guys buy a drinks for both her and the crow.
so i guess now we know you can get away with peeing mere feet from the Capitol if you shout IM PREGNANT at the guards
Just missed the last train for another 5 hours. There are balls in or around the mouth of my life.
The best of us have puked in our office garbage cans. I just hope yours wasn't the metal mesh kind...and bagless like mine. Rock n roll office manager.
So I had sex in a bulldozer lastnight now that's definitely a first...
I just shaved my "bikini area" into a fucking pizza slice
I thought I would be a proper lady and put my spare panties in a ziplock
Everyone is like kids first day of school and I'm over here like I need to stop sleeping with random
He ripped my sink off my bathroom wall and then threw up in it.
Randomize
