i cant believe jose lima did steroids
apparently the kind that make you shitty at baseball
I cant watch the real world now after jersey shore. its like trying to go back to vagina once uve had anal
im sleeping in a hamic at a mansion. best hangover ever
He is like a dragon that makes me want to spread my butt cheeks, so he can fill me with hot fire.
Just found out that guy A from the threesome I had is now dating guy B's younger sister
There should be a rule. If your dick is under 6 inches, you are not allowed to dress as Thor.
When my parents ask if I met any nice guys in California, I'm going to answer, "No, but I have gone home with alot of nice girls". Too much, too soon?
Happy Birthday. May your liver respect you, fat bitches neglect you, hangovers reject you, and AA accept you.
he wears New Balance sneakers on a regular basis, did you really expect the sex to be more than decent?
Tbh I fell asleep cuddling a bag of Brazilian nuts. Franzia never dissappoints me
I woke up with gum stuck to my nipple piercings this morning.. So there's that.
So i had a lucid dream about blowing myself. This is why people love me
I feel worse lying to the guy I hooked up with than I actually do for cheating on my bf
I just want to see his penis in the light. Is that a crime?
i don't think the phrases "so shitty" & "taking care of my newborn" should be combined in the same sentence. leave it to her to make it possible eh?
Randomize