I puked in a mailbox on the way back from your house.
Wait, how do girls masturbate?
I dunno we use shower heads I guess.
..how does it fit?
I just heard the term negative masterbation and I don't believe it
My roommate is on the phone with one of her friends trying to figure out how she threw up IN her pants. I'm not sure whether to burst out laughing or direct her towards Plan B.
She's in the middle of blacking out but is singing Mariah carey songs. Hitting every note.
Either way you look at it, I'm a slut. But either way I look at it, I'm having a fucking blast.
It was almost awkward to look at you naked while listening to Circle of Life. Just saying.
Seriously though a big penis is like a puppy dog, or a sunny day or some other glorious thing
You are such a penis elitist
so he had an ashton kutcher Kelso haircurt. dude, we're in our mid to late 20s, I don't think we can ridicule guys for having hair anymore.
This is exactly why you shouldn't bang your bartender. Although the awkward free shots are a plus.
Let me be the vehicle for you to live out your slutty half-gay dreams.
That tampon felt like a stick in my vagina, I am never making a drunken tampon choice again. Friends don't let friends choose tampons drunk.
Molly I still can't believe u puked in that guys hands and still got laid
This is why we can never be just regular friends. The shit we do is not regular
Is it sad that my idea of a quality foursome would involve one person eating me out while the other two rub my feet?
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