They keep asking what you are doing. I told them to quit calling her "what."
we tried have sex after i gave him a handjob. he wouldnt get hard and kept saying his little boy is broken.. please come get me
I just saw the list where the U.S. doesn't even rank in the top 10 in drinking countries. I know its Tuesday but....its for America
All he wants to do is masturbate while I sit there with my big toe up his ass that is not even the worst part of it.
dude there is absolutely no room for a slide in our room
You started an entire relationship based only on sex and emoticons.
I'm still drunk. it's summer. I just need a hot dog and an aspirin.
because i know somewhere at some party, behind someones closed bed room door youre being feed a key full of mollie.
Fuck me this girl I went home with has a cover on her remote control so there is no spills to ruin it. Imagine how many condoms she's going to make me wear
I gave the bike taxi guy a blowjob because I didn't have any cash. College.
Guy fieri is speaking only to me. We make eye contact. My whole body is vibrating. My head is purring. I am literally marbles.
I just dominated some guy while wearing your moms thong
He screamed like a woman when he came then proceeded to sing "you [we] are the champion" by Queen. I think I'm in love.
I got arrested in a leprechaun onesie
I just saw a guy walking up the stairs with his dick out his pants. I let him know, and he just looked down in shock, laughed, and continued walking up the stairs.
Randomize
