no it's cool...i'm just drinking and studying...cool night
I just sneezed alcohol in a candle and started a fire.
Thanks for feeding me more tequila shots to prevent me from trying to fight her last night. Horrible logic? Yes, but you are the best friend ever
She loves me even though she knows all Ive done. Shes kind of like jesus.
I dont know why the TSA people are looking at me wierd. I mean there is no way i am the only hungover college girl here with nine tally marks on her hand and last nights glitter on her face
the moment we started interpretive dancing last night wouldve been a good time to stop drinking.
Are we hungover?
I got a lapdance from a gay guy in red uggs and spandex shorts with reindeer antlers on. And I don't remember it. Hungover does not even cover it.
I don't want to be with anyone who doesn't accept me for who I am. eating cheeseburgers in bed is my favorite activity.
There is a large scratch and bruise about the size of a pizza bagel next to my vagina. Please text back if you know what happened.
I swear with his long flowing hair and god-like body he looked like Jesus, a bong hitting Jesus
I was smelling my bathroom to make sure it didn't reek of weed...I spaced out and realized I was face to the wall sniffing it for 5 minutes.
I just had the best counseling appointment lets fucking rage
The highlight of my night will be digging in other people's garbage
Woke up at my x's house. He said I talked about how much I love panda's for fourty five minutes. Then made him watch The Little Mermaid with me. Made the walk of shame infront of his mom. Things can only really go up from here.
Wait till you get home.
How was that girls surprise party last night?
Got absolutely destroyed tried to put somebody's leather jacket on and make out with their mother. You know.. the norm
Randomize
