i wore my purity necklace wen we fucked. but its ok cuz simplified was blasting in the background
hahahaha. im glad listening to simplified justifies breaking ur promise to god
Facebook is used to stalk your friends, Twitter is used to stalk celebritie=s, and Myspace is used to stalk underaged girls. Everything else is porn. T=he Internet in a nutshell.
I sold my books for weed money!
Finals don't start for a week...
Legit screaming match in this bar over the differences between cupcakes and muffins.
We removed her tutu and her cape, so there's no risk of her strangling herself.
You guys crashed sarahs vespa into a snowbank and its still there. not cool.
Hello you've reached the get a clue corp. Our business hours are from take a hint to figure it out, eastern standard time. If you prefer to leave a message, don't, call back when you're not crazy, fat, and annoying.
We're pregaming our midterms. Also, when we get our tests back, we're taking a shot for every point we lost. If you're not in, you should just go ahead and transfer.
I was to tired to jerk him off, so he made me hold it while he thrusted into my hand.
Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it.
The lady at walmart just said she is so happy im still alive....Was i that drunk on the 4th? Dont answer that
It turns out my English teacher used to pose for Playboy. She's an inspiration.
I would bite a mans dick off for a chocolate milk.
Girl I'm contemplating picking up some adult diapers. That's how bad this is and it's only day 2.
Was it a bad idea to have spent all of my tax return on coke?
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