im sorry i didnt take advantage of you..iwaned to
i wanted you to too
im a genious. moved my bed and mirror so i can watch the game while Fucking
My mom is making me buy a single zucchini, I look like someone who can't afford a dildo
i wiped a booger on my final. end of semester present.
If your pregnant with his baby maybe we can start getting weed for free.
Well, I just hope you know I had your best interests at heart when I put your sandwich down my pants.
I feel like we should actually go to church one of these days to thank god for saving us from herpes and babies.
I'm not saying I'm drunk, but I'm definitely saying my liver has its work cut out for it.
From time to time I think I'm happy for a second and then I remember how a guy stopped me from giving him head on my birthday weekend.
Also, I saved your name as Everclear last night. No idea why I did that.
I'm doing running of the bulls tomorrow at 7am...except in New Orleans roller derby girls chase you.
So when the drug raid cops tell you, you should get out of the relationship, it probably means its time.
Oh yeah. I pretty much fucked the universes brains out lastnight. It was glorious.
Oh my god the guy at DQ just gave me the number 69 and winked at me
I cuddled with a man named Pickles
Randomize
