I'm walking behind a man wearing a womans shirt, heels, mens pants and a baseball hat
Dude ur right that IS what a vagina looks like!
Do everybody a favor and GET LAID MORE.
"Is there dairy in semen?" was in her recent google searches...so she's lactose intolerant AND a slut.
At one point I was double fisting both beer & ice cream. I love public events in this town.
just cockblocked my boss's 17 year old son at the Christmas party
Why is your name on a gluestick in a plastic baggy stuck to my door?
You shall now refer to my vagina as patty and patty only
You grabbed the hot guy that was making out with his girlfriend all night, slurred "I need to borrow this" then shoved your hand down his pants. All because you thought your ex walked into the bar. It was majestic in its shitshowness.
NO MAKING MOLDS OF ANYONES GENITALS
Fine. Suck all the fun out of life.
Someone is giving away free yogurt on craigslist. Can I get a ride?
I'll be home soonish I need 4th of July sex, it's the American thing to do.
Sometimes a man just deserves to get woken up with a blowjob.
Also this morning I remembered seeing the stripper he threw up on later in the night. She was clothed though.
Ya, It's probably because whenever I close my eyes I see a kitten playing a banjo.
Pretty sure my aunt hooked up with one of my brothers frat brothers at his graduation party
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