We're pre-gaming then going to chuck e cheese's.
If you're joking I'm going to be sad
In retrospect, it was a terrible idea, going down on her with these ulcers in my mouth.
He used one end of the towel to wipe the cum and I used the other end to wipe the tears
are you excited because you wanna see me or because you wanna get laid?
bc i get to see you. naked.
so the girl i've been sleeping with for 3 weeks now just figured out that i don't know her name
its not like she's the last girl on the planet with symmetrical breasts and great skin
First off, get on bc solely in preperation for this event. Second, as my little sister you have a lot of whore to live up to.
If i ever have a kid with an outie i'm giving it up for adoption
Did a bunch of gravity bongs and am watched hours of Frozen Planet. There is nothing in the world I want more than to hug a polar bear.
yeah...that's gonna come up in court
We've only been here for 15 hours and our names are already on 2 separate police reports. We've also been given our "final warning" by the cops and hotel management.
He simply fell in the fire, rolled out and continued to finish his bottle of vodka. Everyone else instantly sobered up just watching it.
You slapped the bar and yelled "daddys thirsty!" at the lady behind the bar
To be fair I was thirsty
When she told you not to yell you looked directly at me and screamed "Man, she sucks!"
I snuck out three pillows from the hotel i was rolling so hard. They are like little clouds. I regret nothing.
It was terrible. I am sore from head to toe, neither of us got off, and we were at it for an hour and a half, I faked having a heart episode so we could stop. It worked.
Randomize
