you need to do more things constructive for your career. like wearing pants more often.
You cheat on me once, shame on me. You cheat on me with a white girl, it's fucking over
dude i woke up in a pile of chocolate chips. this has to stop happening
No shame. Just smoked a bowl with a Norwegian. Feels like something to cross off a list.
We were playing hot potato with real potatoes at 3am
i was beyond wasted so he tucked me into bed and wrapped the blankets around me like a burrito. then gave me a bloody mary and an omlet when i woke up. and who says living with your cousin is a bad thing?!
I'm working on finding a bottomless situation. Both pants and mimosas.
Just found weed in an empty handle. Who knew Capitan Morgan was also a gardener?
Well I walked the wrong way for a little bit and I don't remember if I fell asleep or not but I definitely laid down under the over pass for a while
But he has cupcakes AND I'm guaranteed an orgasm. .. I feel like I shouldn't even have to actually make a decision here.
He said he was a banker. Then he told me he made 15 an hour. I said he was a shitty banker then fucked his friend.
It was crazy man, at one point after already going 3 rounds I tried to breakaway for a smoke...she yanked me by the nipple hair back on top of her.
A German guy asked me to take a bath with him. I can't tell if he's just an eccentric European or a run of the mill creep.
I fell into a police barricade, a cop helped me up and asked if I've been drinking. I just looked at him and said "dude.." He proceeded to take out his handcuffs
Shame is for Republicans.
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