I woke up this morning and was hoping we drank enough last night to have a unicorn drawn on my wrist. Good News: We did.
You're just telling me nice things because you came in my eye.
Ok say I was sexually attracted to a patient who also happens to be in high school...on how many levels is that illegal? And will I actually hear the laws break when I fuck him
They sext over her pic comments. Role playing as wolves.
Way to high for badminton right now. This is gonna be a shitshow.
What are you doing St Patricks day? I'm banned from all work parties with open bar ever since the cinco de mayo party that I dumped a drink on my co-workers head and played air guitar on my boss' ankle cast.
Ok in all seriousness. Alcohol intake is now restricted for me. I found handcuffs in my trunk.
Going to the u of w I constantly have that moment of, oh hey I felt you up at that rave at folk fest that one time. Winnipeg is too small.
I remember saying your puke looked like a jellyfish and you got very offended.
Sweet! It'll be a "that-minor-I-used-to-serve-alcohol-to-is-no-longer-a-minor" party!!!
We were cuddling in his bed and I asked him a question and followed by making a microphone with my hand and told him to speak into it. If he never talks to me again that's probably why.
I need to start journaling my drunk thoughts. Drunk me is fucking brilliant & sober me is missing out.
You walked in with a bag of weed and asked for a watermelon. For some reason they actually gave you one, and you made it into a perfectly working bong. Two of them offered their girlfriends to you for the night.
youll appreciate my drinking habit one day...
I'm like a camel in the desert in a black hole I'm so thirsty.
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