Hey sorry i havent responded. i threw up on my phone while i was sleeping
found a new level of pathetic. i watched a guy pick out cigarette butts from a jar that weren't completely finished. make sure you go somewhere in life.
Is it possible for Craig Seger to wear a normal suit and not look like an asshole on national tv?
i swear, about 40% of my drunken life is spent having sex with him.
Well if all fails we can always become surrogate mothers. I hear that pays well.
I'm sitting here in nothing but my panties, eating beef jerky and reese's for breakfast.Today is not the day to expect me to make sound life decisions.
explain the broken jalepenos in my underwear drawer?
Please don't let me drink ever again. I apparently told him he could stay but as there was no room in the bed he'd have to lie on top of me and he'd need to anchor himself on with his penis so he didn't fall off.
I heard liver failure is in for 2012 anyways
I mean i can't really be mad...either way i was gonna fuck him or hate fuck him, so it's basically a win/win situation.
We literally just Chinese fire drilled so I could give him road head.
It's 11:13am and my chem prof is drinking a beer in class. I guess finals week is stressful for them too
She showed me her tits outside Taco Bell....After she flashed the dude working there in an effort to get in.
we've dated a week and made out twice. he is taking it slow. but his body is stupid sexy. just want him to stop respecting me and fuck me like a gutter slut. respect me later im not getting younger.
Dude, the T Swift concert might not be so bad after all. Can you say milfs living vicariously through their teenage daughters? Score.
Randomize
