how much do you want to bet that her wedding invites will be vera bradley themed? loser has to frame theirs.
Two girls are now jumping in the ocean naked at 10 PM...and I was just starting to hate Ocean City
People were stuck in the elevator screaming and freaking out. I banged on the door and yelled, "fire depart!" They got excited and then I ran away. lolz
I lost control in the snow and hit a parked car. I went into our building to get a pen and paper to leave a note and when I came back the car was gone and there was a hot girl there. I used the pen and paper to get her number.
Her brother walked in on her giving me a bj and just laughed. I got a highfive before I left.
I just got hard thinking about a crunch wrap. Im done
Second night spent with creepy guy. I either need to change his nickname or stop doing this.
Chances are I'll be there for your wedding. Camelbaks filled with jack and coke are appropriate attire, right?
You can buy vodka at target here.. Maybe Missouri isn't so bad after all
I told my mom about how you got white girl wasted and sobbed about Whitney Houston. She sends her condolences.
tell her thanks so much
My roommate has gone Christmas crazy. It looks like Jack Frost came all over my living room. Wanna come fuck me in the fake snow by the fireplace?
Just an FYI if we break up I'm going to sleep with your cousin or who ever my dealer is.
Last night you made me help you pick the raisins out of a kashi bar and acted like it was the most important thing to ever happen to you or our friendship
I'm by the tree and the Dora the explorer balloon .. Look for the Dora the explorer balloon
Side note: I just realized that I can make my hand warmers double as a heated push up bra.
Randomize
