her voice honestly makes me want to vomit. i have springsteen cranked up all the way.
if he's not good at sex i should be allowed to have sex with someone who is. that's a totally legit statement i think
Just looked at my call log. I called Planned Parenthood at 3am.
and he thought i came like four times in 2 mins. my leg just kept cramping up
Dude has a bag of wine attached to his belt. These guys don't fuck around.
Dude its so hot it my room I can't jack off. Its gonna be a long summer.
please dont pick me up from the airport dressed like a terrorist.
Bc when the owner of your local gay bar and a drag king ask you to take them to a rival gay bar 2hrs away at 4 in the morning YOU GO.
stuck in the elevator with that hot guy from the 3rd flood. Worried he can smell my spray tan and desperation
i'm going through an 80s music phase. and by phase i mean i will only have sex to white snake
I hit a child with a fudge sickle from a moving vehicle after he flipped me off, I feel like a God. Tell no one. My partner didn't see it.
I'm laying in bed listening to Purple Rain on repeat. If you wanna bone, come up, but if not, at least Prince understands me.
I need a thor helmet and I need to find my heavy duty drinking mug
Just told my shrink " this was a year for whoring around"
I have commenced my lesbian college experimentation. Wish me luck
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