I have a pretty basic diameter of my vaginal abyss. I'm sure it won't hurt.
So he flipped me over and suddenly went limp then told me he was thinking about his ex.
so you punched his junk, right?
I was 10 minutes late leaving for lunch today because I couldn't lose a boner. It is impossible to tuck it when your shirt is tucked in...gotta quit facebook stalking hot chicks at work
oh yeah I know that guy. he's legit. slept in my closet a few times
This might sound awkward, but can I borrow a dildo for class?
You may or may not have poured bacon fat down her shirt
Holy christ fuck what has my trainwreck of a life come to just blew a 17 year old so help me god
Straight guys just can't stay away. My penis must have pheromones or something.
you peed off the balcony at your sisters and asked someone below to catch it with a cup
Right now he's sitting in the chair pointing to me to go away. He's trying to have quiet time with his penis.
I never saw such an emotional argument over yellow vs. spicy mustard.
If you had a dick, I would hope it falls off and comes back to haunt you while fucking your ears at night. But you don't. But if you did, that's how mad I am at you
When the state fair security guard came to yell at her for having outside food and drink she threatened to kick him if he tried to stop her and then she proceeded to chug the whole bottle.
classic
Rebounding with her sister was the best idea i ever had.
So my best friends wedding ended with everyone seeing me getting eaten out behind the forbes church. Classy!
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