HIV tests are more positive than that guy
She actually asked me 'is it in yet?' I deleted the vid.
this ugly chick literally cried last night because i wouldnt let her give me head
maybe we can find two twins tonight and bang them together and then my life is complete
I'm impressed you managed to decipher 'annslqllpprebBcncnj' into 'I'm drunk at the Vic, come pick me up and do me on the kitchen table'
And I can say one thing, I look pretty good in high wasted pants. I don't know if that helps. But I do. God I'm high.
who's job is it to make sure we don't run out of tp since the incident of 09'... Thats right you go get some
Was it just me or did you also find it awkward when "glad you came" started playing on pandora right after you finished?
WHAT KIND OF SELF RESPECTING 28 YEAR OLD WOMAN WAKES UP IN A FRAT HOUSE?!?'
The cougar kind?
I found out his moms name, maiden name, profession, and office location, his dads name and profession, his home phone, picture of their house, all of his work profiles, and the cost of their house. All I'm trying to do is find his damn twitter
Blizzard, Hour 9: I'm 7 beers deep and have finished Ninja Turtles. I am listening to the NYPD and Nassau Fire Dept pipes and drums and writing new drum scores in my head, which I may or may not remember tomorrow
Sext me about skeletons
I think the pizza delivery guy is getting a handjob next door.
I love waking up to reeses ice cream. But I DONT love waking up to it all over my cat. I blame you.
I just walked in on Joel doing a buck naked tripod headstand in front of the mirror so he could see the bug bite on his balls
Randomize
