i love marijuana more then i could love a human baby.
like literally i think i'm sweating out semen right now
i actually have a tan line from him holding my boob while we were sunbathing
All his texts have the signature of a date with a smile. I asked him what it means. IT'S THE DAY HE QUIT DOING DRUGS
She's licking the seat belt now. Feeling a little uncomfortable
She just got out of the car and said "hold on purse.. It's going to be a bumpy ride"
Writing apology letters and leaving them on peoples doors for your actions is NOT what I want to be doing at 6am.
I have your shoes, your bike, and someones blue underwear. Round 2 tonight?
I didn't cheat on him. He just hasn't been informed of the open part of our relationship.
We waved. But it was a "let's hook up" wave.
i tied my phone to a string attached to my bra. i am NOT losing it tonight
I've justified worse with less. I had sex with your brother because he was wearing a nice sweater
I'm debating a nap but also debating breaking into the liquor cabinet
Let's put it this way. Mom is bringing me a new shirt and I smell like lube.
He saw me naked after our first date and still asked for a second.. so I think we’re doing good
Randomize
