Riding home in a carseat. Worst. Night. Ever.
I never thought that I'd ever use the phrase "and the resulting ice cream explosion" seriously at work...
since when did accompanying a guy to a wedding mean that anal was required that night?
I love seeing the creepers that friend request me outside of facebook. its like seeing a unicorn in the middle of campus.
Practice the "sorry I may have given you herpes" conversation with me before I call him and break the news
we just ordered 30 dollars worth of french fries...whats wrong with us?
It hit me after I slept with his best friends and brother, that maybe I took it a bit far
Before you say anything, my vagine does NOT discriminate against young dads
At the party. I feel like I just walked into a lifesize blunt.
Well were gunna have to wash the couch cover now...maybe even the couch, soap or fire your decision
I mean you guys are my friends and all but if you fuck with me I will not hesitate to set you on fire
They are the perfect team. One always has weed, the other always has cigarettes. They're like the Batman and Robin of drugs
just so you know.. snorkeling hungover: great decision. I was throwing up and he couldn't even tell!
I felt like I was selling my soul to satan but then I realized I already pawned it for drug money
Yeah. Broke it off. Saw her cheating after she forgot to turn her zoom off. Ring=$$$. Not making that mistake-priceless
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