Slept with that guy from the bar last night. Only got 2 1/2 hours of sleep. Eyes were so bloodshot this morning that the principal sent me home b/c she thought I had pink eye. God I love teaching elementary school...
well i just puked at a family gathering so i can cross that off the bucket list
going to class early so i have time to go on the moonbounce. this is why i go to art school.
How do i write this on his wall without making it sound like he gave me an std?
it was really bad. he went around saying "I want you inside of me" to everyone.
you got thrown out for pissing in a cup in the corner. you told one guy it was okay because you went to college and that he wouldn't understand
I'm actually agreeing with glenn beck. What the FUCK was in that margarita?!
I'm going to leave the fate of whether I go to my midterms up to my dealer hitting me up or not
From russia with love. But also with chlamydia.
He ate me out while I was wearing a tiara.... I think I could get used to this
My head feels like a nest made of hair and cum
Then me, her, and her mom snorted tequila. The bartender was in shock.
And THIS is why we get drunk. No good story, documentation, or event happens by eating a salad. Alcohol consumption leads to good things
Why did you load my phone up with pics of Al Gore?
I'm pretty sure I just won at life. I touched the bushy tail of a squirrel while he had his mouth full and was digging in a plant on campus. That is all.
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