Banned from zoo.
Again?
you think the cum will come out of moms black shirt?
Just crossed the line with my beat friends girl twinsie. Didn't realize tillz afta how much the look alike and an thougholy creeped out. Thanks ciroc
I would give up sex for lent, but I think Jesus would understand that I went too long without it to go back now.
Can you check your dirty laundry bag for my tooth.
The bathroom is trashed. Someone took down all the rings of the shower curtain and Scott threw up on the curtain liner. All the soap and shampoo is in the guest bedroom and the lightbulbs are in a drawer. And there are vom footprints.
Just got a blowjob on the pier where my great-grandfather entered America.
the thought 'we cant do it, we're in a public place' crossed my mind, and then I realized he's succeeding if he's trying to domesticate me.
elevator sex. pronto.
I plan on being naked for at least 2/3 of the wedding.
Is it worth it to drive to a zoo with a high possibility of sex at said zoo?
I knew this night was headed for bad when I was drinking cherry bombs out of a sippy cup in the shower
lets do drugs on my lunch break tomorrow
three of my fingers are bleeding and the only thing on my phone rn is a google search of 'Allison Janney'
I just watched my high school guidance counselor pee in the backyard of this party.
I have to stop at Sheetz to put my bra back on before I meet you hold on
Randomize
